Double Take

 

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MY MOTHER SCARED ME WHEN I WAS 3 MONTHS OLD

HITCHCOCK (voice):
I think my mother scared me when I was three months old.
She said: ‘Boo!’

[Laughter]

HITCHCOCK:
This evening’s tale begins with a nightmare-like experience, but that is only a prelude to the terrifying events which follow.

STORY:
They say that if you meet your double, you should kill him. Or that he will kill you. I can’t remember which but... the gist of it is that two of you is one too many. By the end of the script, one of you must die.

HITCHCOCK:
But first we have another device, which can bring tears to the eyes of the more fastidious: a television commercial.

FOLGERS AD #1:
[Janey:]
Oh, Mister McGregor! Oh, thank heavens, you’re still here!

[Mister McGregor:]
I was just about to go home. What’s wrong, Janey?

[Janey:]
I’ve got to do something about my coffee!

[Mister McGregor:]
Is your coffee really that bad, Janey?

[Janey:]
Jim says it’s awful. What can I do?

[Mister McGregor:]
Better try this!

[Janey:]
Instant Folgers? Is it good?

[Mister McGregor:]
Tastes good as fresh-perked!

[Janey:]
I’ll try it.

[back at home]
[Jim:]
Great coffee! And the folks loved it!

[Jamie:]
It’s instant Folgers, tastes good as fresh-perked!

TITLE:
TASTES GOOD AS FRESH-PERKED!

HITCHCOCK:
And now join me if you will, while we contemplate the perfect crime.

STORY:
I have pondered many times, but somehow never understood, the meaning of that fateful encounter one August afternoon in 1962: a story, I was to find out, that was scripted nonetheless by me.

I have chewed the details over and over so repeatedly that the memory of it has become inaccurate, like a film scratched and faded by the years.

The episode seems too strange to be real.